Today has been a long day. A long day of waiting.
Tonight, my mom and dad learned some about the results of the CT scan preformed late last night. The scan revealed three lymph nodes that are swollen around her pancreas. The swelling of the nodes leaves many questions, not many answers. The doctor has determined that they will need to biopsy the nodes to discern what might be causing the swelling. A typical biopsy would be down the throat, for my mom, this isn't an option as a result of her surgery. The doctors are consulting with a gastrointestinal specialist to decipher what the next best avenue might be, most likely alaparoscopic procedure which we will probably learn about tomorrow. The doctor mentioned that the nodes could be swollen as a result of the narrowed pancreatic duct (which is our MAJOR PRAYER and hope) but wants to make sure every base is covered.
With all this said, we want to come to each of you again and humbly ask you to come before our Heavenly Father and pray...
-That the nodes would miraculously be JUST swollen as a result of the narrowing of the pancreatic duct
-That the cancer would remain GONE
-That my mom's doctor's would have discernment in choosing the best biopsy method(s)
-That peace would transcend each of our understandings as this time of uncertainty and waiting is hard and wearing
-That God would continue to receive all the Glory
I will be honest, as I am simply speaking for myself here... tonight I simply want to pound my hands against God's chest and yell "Why? Why? Why?" as this time of waiting feels rather reminiscent of last September when her initial diagnosis took place. In feeling this way, and pleading the question "Why?" I am reminded of God's hand throughout this journey...
-How He made us aware of her need to initially go to the doctor with what seemed like a pesky stomach ache
-How He led her to the doctors and facilities that He did
-How the initial chemo provided an avenue to even get to surgery and shrunk the awful Goliath-like tumor
-How her surgeon got negative margins when removing the tumor
-How 30 of the 30 lymph nodes removed were clear!
-How He provided (and continues) to provide her with compassionate caregivers
-How He provided both familiar and new community who have rallied around her (and our entire family)...and who continue to do so
-How He allowed (and continues) you all to provide encouragement as you have shared your stories and been her/our cheerleaders
-How He is using this continually evolving journey to empathize with others walking through similar uncertainty
-How this journey is reminding our hearts of our ultimate yearning for Heaven where cancer (and no other fear or sickness) has any place!
Staying focused on such sweet glimpses of His goodness help drive the fear of uncertainty away and provide reminders of how precious each day really is.
Thank you for continuing to rally around my mom...we are so sorry for the lack of communication/updates... we were all basking in the joy of not having much to update.
Be blessed.
"They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord. Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear ;in the end they will look in triumph on their foes." Psalm 112:7-8
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